The best comment I’ve read that succinctly captures the kook-off between ex-Congressman Eric Massa and Glenn Beck: “It was Beck’s Geraldo in Capone’s vault moment”.
The best contextualizing of Massa’s tickle me Elmo defense is from The Onion (circa 2006): “Why Do Homosexuals Keep Sucking My Cock?”
Riveting television, to be sure.
Not even a genius like Rush Limbaugh could detect the whiff of ‘wangy’ fruitcake wafting from Massa’s shower towel. It took the smartest (or highest) man in America 24 hours to pad away from Massa’s meltdown. In fairness, El Rushbo was hard-pressed to continue his embrace of the ex-Congressman’s initial hosiility against the White House after discovering Massa had previously denounced him as an unpatriotic dick: Rush had no option but to do the only honorable thing and proclaimed Massa a spurious flake.
Politico has yet to determine whether it was Massa’s unbecoming disrespect for Limbaugh’s butt boil deferment (keeping the warrior pillow-bound during Vietnam) or allegations of male staff groping that soured their budding relationship. I find it hard to believe that Limbaugh would give Massa the cold shoulder just for playing a little grab ass. Known to be a rather randy man, Limbaugh doesn’t let his love of Jesus override innocuous hand-to-todger horseplay. Real Christian men, like Limbaugh, know the difference between locker room jocularity and full-blown 'faggotry'. It’s liberalism's perverse ideology that has ruined steamy bonding between naked white millionaires. Because time-honored mores have been polluted, an inadvertent, near-sighted peter-pull invariably leads to an awkward apology and strange reminiscence about the good old days of roped soap.
Compounding Rush’s on-air lapse of judgment is his declaration to flee the U.S. if HCR becomes a reality. On record preferring New Zealand as his Elba-of-choice, the beloved conservative icon has apparently changed his mind, and is now threatening Costa Rica with his presence.
New Zealand is a beautiful country. A friend of mine lived there for several years and returns whenever his wife will let him. Unfortunately, New Zealand is a poor sex tourist destination -- unless the traveler has a thing for sheep. Although lacking in sheep, Costa Rica does have socialized medicine -- and has for some time. I guess this is why Limbaugh back-pedaled this afternoon, and slurred that he never intended to live in Costa Rica, only hang around until his Viagra was gone or he ran afoul of honest vice cops .
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